Southern Weddings

Oh my. How does one write the real wedding introduction for one’s own wedding?? There’s so much I could say, and yet, thankfully, the lovely images by Tanja Lippert say more than I ever could. Of course, that hasn’t stopped me from adding in a few notes here and there! Since y’all had such a hand in planning it, I very much hope you enjoy this extended look at my and John’s wedding. And if you haven’t yet seen it in print, do pick up a copy of V5 here!

What was the weather like on your big day? It was PERFECT. Bright blue sky, crisp but warm air, mid-70s… we couldn’t have handpicked a better day. I am so thankful it turned out as it did! The only thing I ever really knew I wanted for my someday future wedding was that I wanted it to take place in Connecticut (where both John and I grew up), and I wanted it to take place in September. It’s my absolute favorite month in New England, and the day God delivered was exactly the day I was picturing when I dreamed about a September wedding.

Y’all know I love paper, and I always knew I would have high standards for my one-day wedding invitation. Working with Magpie Paper Works and MM Ink to produce this beauty was a dream come true!

My sister in law drew the custom map below — isn’t it darling?

My wedding dress search spanned three states and five stores. I started the hunt in Charleston, where I fell in love with a Monique Lhuillier and a Vera Wang at Maddison Row. I then looked in Connecticut at The White Dress by the Shore, but didn’t even have a top contender at the end of that trip. My third stop (with just Mom this time) was at Nitsa’s in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. The first dress I tried on was the “Brisa,” by Christos, and the best way I can describe it is that it just felt like me. I had never seen another bride wear it before, which I didn’t think was important to me, but apparently it was! (And since I work at a wedding magazine, stumping me with a “new” gown is pretty tough.) We visited two more stores after that to make sure, but it was Brisa in the end. The funniest part about wearing my dress was that people asked to touch it all day! I guess the skirt looked very soft :)

Our beautiful horsehair-edged veil was a custom creation by Chaviano Couture. I dreamed it up with John’s sister, who got married exactly two months before John and I did. It’s our hope that our sisters and maybe even children will one day wear it, too!

I struggled for a long time with what to inscribe on our Paloma’s Nest ring bearer bowl, and eventually decided on simply “grateful,” plus our wedding date.

I have a very distinct style when it comes to flowers, and happily, I found my match in Elisabeth from Blush Floral Design. I asked for a lush garden look with garden roses, ranunculus, sweet pea, lambs ear, and anemones in whites, creams, and the palest blushes. The stem of my bouquet (which I loved!) was wrapped in pleated pale blue ribbon I picked up on a special trip to New York City. We incorporated tiny apples and berries into the cocktail hour and reception centerpieces, as well.

You can read more about our decision to do a first look right here. It wasn’t the overwhelmingly emotional part of the day that it is for some people — more joyful — but we were glad we did it and it worked well with our timeline.

My bridesmaids wore long charcoal gray dresses by Dessy. Choosing bridesmaid attire was one of the, if not the, hardest decision I made while wedding planning, though they all looked beautiful in the end!

I adore that photo of our dads! So good.

Bride’s favorite detail of the wedding: I really loved the boutonniere and bell boards we set up at the church. Upon arrival, gentlemen were invited to pin on a velvet ribbon boutonniere, and ladies could take a little silver bell to ring at the end of our ceremony. I loved that these details made our guests feel special, and included in the celebration, right from the beginning!

In the days and months leading up to our wedding, I wondered often about how my emotions would manifest themselves on the big day. I tend to be pretty unpredictable with crying – I’ll tear up at commercials, but often won’t shed a drop in situations where it’s expected, you know? If anything, I expected to cry while reciting our vows, and during the father daughter dance. Turns out I was wrong on both accounts, though I did get extremely emotional at one point.

Throughout the morning of our wedding, I felt quite calm, and quietly excited. I didn’t feel nervous, and I didn’t feel particularly emotional. Our first look was joyful, not tearful. Since we had already seen each other, bridesmaids, groomsmen, and our families all gathered together in the basement of the church to await the start of the ceremony. Soon it was time for us to line up, and when I was standing next to my Dad in the narthex I felt the first flip in my stomach. I got another one when the string trio began to play the first song of the processional. After the last bridesmaid had begun her walk down the aisle, the doors to the sanctuary closed, and my Dad and I moved into position. I had specifically asked that the doors not be opened until about fifteen seconds into my song, so that we would hit the top of the aisle at the right point in the music. My emotions started to build, and I couldn’t help smiling, while we waited behind the closed doors. When the doors finally opened, I could hear an audible intake of breath from our guests. (That sounds horribly vain, but it’s true!) I think it was in part because I was wearing a blusher veil, which is so unexpected these days but so me, and my Dad looked stunningly handsome in his dress whites (military uniform). I had my eyes locked on John’s the entire time we walked down the aisle, but when we reached our guests, I had to start taking deep breaths in and out to try and control the impending flood. Once we got a little closer, I could hear the entire row of bridesmaids and entire row of groomsmen sniffling, and that finally opened the flood gates for me. We all had tears rolling down our faces throughout the beginning of our ceremony, so much so that our pastor had to remind everyone to take deep breaths before he began.

Who was one of the most special guests at your wedding? Besides my grandmothers, and John’s relatives who came from as far away as Taipei and Shanghai, our most special guest was our pastor, Carl. He’s the pastor of our church in North Carolina, and has had such a huge impact on our lives and our life together since we met him two years ago. We were so excited and grateful when he agreed to fly north to lead our ceremony. We were equally as devastated when we found out two months before our wedding that he had been diagnosed with cancer. He had surgery about a month before, and happily, was recovered in time to still make the trip. His presence was one of the most special parts of our entire day – our wedding would have felt entirely different (at least to John and me) had he not been a part of it.
Were there any family traditions you included in the ceremony? We chose to serve communion to our guests, since we found deep meaning in having our first act as a newly married couple be one of service. We used a silver cup from the church where my grandmother was baptized to hold the wine. We weren’t sure how our guests would react, but many told us communion was their favorite part of the day.
Did you write your own vows? We wrote our own vows and recited traditional vows, as we felt they both brought something meaningful to the ceremony. Our personal vows took the form of promises to each other. My favorite line from John’s vows was “I promise to always be available to and grateful for your love.” His favorite part from mine was the last line: “And if at the end, all I have done is loved you with all of my heart, I promise that for me, that will be enough.”

At some points during the budgeting process, I second-guessed our decision to hire a string trio, but I am SO glad we did. They played so beautifully, and really set the tone for the ceremony. They were accompanied by my childhood piano teacher, and having her there injected one more layer of meaning into the day. The moms walked down the aisle to “Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring,” one of my very favorite hymns, and one that just says WEDDING to me (in the best way possible). My bridesmaids entered to “In Christ Alone,” which I had never heard mentioned as a processional, but which we received many compliments on. I loved it. My processional was to “A Thousand Years.” I debated long and hard over what song to use, and worried that I might regret choosing something so contemporary (especially something that first appeared in the Twilight movies – yikes!). But in the end, it was most important to me to have something that pulled at my emotional chords and made me feel something, and “A Thousand Years” most certainly did. If you’ve only heard the radio version, you’ve got to check out Vitamin String Quartet’s rendition! Our congregational hymn was “Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee” (love!), and our recessional was “Ode to Joy,” the same one my parents and my older sister and her husband used at their weddings.

How did the two of you meet? Tell us your story. We grew up in the same small town in Connecticut, and went to different elementary schools, but had many of the same friends. Despite this, we did not meet each other until middle school, when all the elementary schools pooled into one school. I had a crush on John, but sadly, it was not reciprocated. Fast forward to high school, where we were still in interlocking groups of friends, but more acquaintances than anything else. I still thought John was cute, of course, but he was dating someone else. Fast forward again to senior year. We had a class together with a mutual good friend, and so began to hang out more. Unbeknownst to me, John had developed a crush on me, but didn’t really know what to do about it. He even resorted to loudly talking about how much he liked me while sitting a few seats away from my younger sister in the cafeteria (hoping she would overhear and report back), but to no avail. Finally, in January of their senior year, John (with the encouragement of our friend Jeremy) mustered up the courage to say something. He called me up out of the blue and blurted out “So… I think I like you.” To which I responded with nervous giggles, obviously. A first date was eventually arranged (ice skating), and we have been together ever since.
Three adjectives that describe the day are: joyful, thoughtful, and precious
How many guests attended your wedding? About 120
What was the design inspiration for your wedding? I have been studying wedding magazines for about thirteen years now, and working at one for three. So I’ve seen a lot of weddings, and a ton of creative and unique ideas. Though I love almost all of them, I knew the vast majority weren’t right for John and me. Our wedding style was classic, while never taking itself too seriously. We wanted everything to fit seamlessly into our beautiful seaside location, and in the end, I think it did.
What were your wedding colors? This is a tough question! People always looked at me like I had two heads when I tried to explain. Let’s go with powder blue, black and white, blush pink, dove gray, and environmental green. There might have been some peach in there, too.
What was the biggest challenge you faced when planning your wedding? Isn’t it always the budget? I almost feel guilty giving that answer, though, because we were extremely lucky to have a larger amount to work with than most, and were so grateful for everything we were able to afford. But when you know what’s out there, it’s hard to stop yourself from wanting more!
What range did your budget fall into? $25,000-$50,000
How did you spend the morning or afternoon before your big day? Though we had to wake up earlier than I would have chosen (6:15) to start the hair and makeup process, the morning was perfect – slow and relaxed, and spent with just my sisters, John’s sisters, and our moms. We had reserved a large suite at a cozy local inn, and we had the windows and door open all day, letting in the crisp early fall air. I also made a custom playlist to set the right mood, a tip I’d highly recommend!
Did you have any special readings? We spent much time choosing our readings, and we were so happy with them in the end! We chose one from the Bible, Colossians 3:12-17, and had a good friend with whom we went to high school and college read it. (She also has her Masters of Divinity, so she was extra qualified!) Our second reading was an excerpt from “Mere Christianity” by C.S. Lewis, which begins “Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing.” Our dear friend from college read that one. Our final reading was the one we had the most difficulty choosing. After going through a box of old notes we had written to each other over the years, we finally settled on an excerpt from “The Petite Prince” that I had included with a letter to John years before. For those who are familiar with the book, we choose the conversation between the fox and the prince about what it means to be tamed. Our ninth grade English teacher and my mentor of eleven years read it, which was only fitting, as she was the one who had introduced me to it years before.
Who participated in your ceremony? Growing up I had three best friends (all of whom I’m still quite close with), and one of them did us the honor of singing “Set Me As a Seal” and “Come Thou Font of Every Blessing” during communion. It was so beautiful!

Inkspot Crow Films and Sperry Tents are delightful members of our Blue Ribbon Vendor Directory!

Written with love by Emily