Southern Weddings

Hey SW mavens! Did y’all have a pretty/spooky/fabulous Halloween? I think Katharine is still on a high from the one holiday a year at least partially dedicated to the consumption of candy. But on to all things etiquette! Today’s query comes from a reader who’s planning a wedding in Greensboro:

“My wedding is next May in Greensboro, NC. My future husband and his groomsmen (including his father, who is best man) are all wearing light khaki suits. My family is confused about what my father should wear. Should he purchase the same “stone” colored suit to match the men in the bridal party? Or, since he is not technically a part of the groom’s party, should he wear a classic black suit? Our wedding is at 5pm indoors in a church. And while our ceremony is traditional, my groom was set on wearing the light khaki suits. To complicate things a little more, I have a step father. My mother feels that my step father should definitely wear a black suit, since he will not be playing an official role in the bridal party or wedding. Do you think this makes sense?”

Great question! It’s hard enough to coordinate a bridal party these days, isn’t it? Add in all the other moving family parts and things can get tricky pretty quickly, sartorially speaking. If your father wants to match the groom and his men and your groom (and his father, I suppose) were fine with that, I would say that’s an excellent option. You won’t need to worry about finding another appropriate outfit, and everyone is guaranteed to look cohesive.

I also love, however, when the parent on either side doesn’t match exactly but coordinates. Perhaps your Dad could wear the same suit, but a different tie (still within your color scheme, of course). Or, conversely, maybe he could wear a black suit but the same tie as the groomsmen. To give you an example, the groom and groomsmen at my sister’s wedding this summer wore khaki pants, a navy blazer, and a navy and yellow tie. My Dad wore the same thing. The groom’s Dad, however, wore a khaki corduroy blazer and navy pants along with the navy and yellow tie. My Mom wore a blue dress, and the mother of the groom wore yellow. Everyone looked (both together and individually) fantastic!

If you’re worried about the black suit looking too harsh or overly formal next to the khaki, I’d suggest a gray suit. The same goes for your step father: gray or black is perfect, and though he could choose to coordinate his accessories in some way to your color scheme, it’s not necessary.

I hope that answers your question! Readers, what do you think? Weigh in in the comments section! And if you have an etiquette conundrum of your own, don’t hesitate to email me at emily at iloveswmag dot com.

Photo in post by Kate Murphy. Photos in header by Millie Holloman.

Written with love by Emily