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Monthly Archives: August 2012

Caitlyn’s advice to decorate in the style you like, choose food that you find delicious, and play songs that you love, even if they’re not “cool” at the moment, is a great reminder for all of us planning a wedding! Using that mantra as a guideline, Caitlyn + John’s Arkansas wedding at the Pratt Place Barn came together beautifully and joyfully, on what appears to be a gorgeous spring day. Make sure you scroll down to see their chair decor — my favorite detail! — photographed to perfection by Daniel Kim.

Isn’t Caitlyn’s lace gown gorgeous? It was my mother’s dress, and after I got engaged, she mentioned that it was still in the closet. I was more than willing to put it on, and in the first fitting I knew it was perfect. No alterations needed to be done except for taking off the sleeves and adding a “capped sleeve” look to the dress — otherwise, it fit like a glove!

Did you write your own vows? Yes, we used a mix of traditional vows and our own vows. My favorite line was when we promised to sacrifice ourselves for each other’s joy.
What readings, if any, did you have at your ceremony? John’s dad read Psalm 16.
Tell us about some of the songs you used throughout your wedding. I walked down the aisle to “Sea of Love” by Cat Powers. Our first dance was to “Living of Love” by the Avett Brothers and the father-daughter dance was to “You got a Friend” by James Taylor. We also played “Over the Rainbow” by Israel Kamakawiwoʻole.

This photo and the one below it are so jubilant! Love.

How did the two of you meet? Tell us your story. John and I met our first month of college. His friend (who ended up our best man) had a crush on my roommate, and so they would find excuses to hang out with us. We were friends for a year before we started dating, and then were together all through college and got engaged the year after graduating. We were long distance when John was in graduate school in Massachusetts and I worked in Arkansas, and then we got married the following year.
Describe the proposal. For the proposal, John took me on a tour of our relationship. We had dinner where we said I love you, danced in the field where we danced for the first time, painted a picture in the office where we spent our time in college, and then he proposed where he asked me out and we had our first kiss.
In what month did you get married? May
How many guests attended your wedding? 170
Did you decide to do a “first look”? Yes. We felt as though we would be less nervous if we saw each other before the wedding, and we wanted keep the amount of pictures after the ceremony minimal so that guests would not be waiting for us.
Our favorite detail of the wedding was: My favorite detail was the Mexican banners that were hanging from the ceiling.
What was the biggest challenge you had to overcome while planning your wedding? Our biggest challenge was that we were planning our wedding long distance. John was living in Massachusetts, and I was in Arkansas. Our goal was to make a lot of the decisions together, and the distance made that difficult.
What range did your wedding budget fall into? $10,000 – $25,000
What is the one thing you are most happy you splurged on? My splurge was our photographer, Daniel Kim. He was amazing, and really captured the memories of our wedding.
What was your most memorable moment about your wedding day? The thing that we remember most was simply having all of our friends and family in one spot.
What advice do you have for folks currently planning a wedding? Our advice is to enjoy the process, and don’t let planning your wedding get in the way of enjoying your engagement and the days leading up to your wedding. Also, decorate, have food, and play songs that you enjoy, even if they aren’t “cool” at the moment.
What’s next for you as a couple? What are you looking forward to in the future? We are moving up north to Massachusetts, where John will finish his graduate degree. We plan on enjoying the New England area, especially in the fall.

emily Written with love by Emily
10 Comments
  1. avatar Caroline D reply

    such lovely pictures, john and caitlyn! glad you’re up in NE to enjoy the fall now… :-)

  2. avatar Jennifer reply

    I adore the groom’s look! Any information on the shirt?

  3. avatar 33 Chair Swag & Wedding Chair Decoration Ideas | Confetti Daydreams reply

    […] from I Love SW Mag, here’s another fun and vintage interpretation of the “Mr and Mrs” chair […]

  4. avatar On writing our vows… « My autumn dream reply

    […] in front of everyone and tells personal, romantic stuff to each other. Photo by Daniel Kim in Southern Weddings. Via […]

  5. avatar On Writing Our Vows… | Weddingbee reply

    […] by Daniel Kim on Southern Weddings via […]

  6. avatar Arkansas Barn By Daniel Kim Wedding | Wedding Idea Spot reply

    […] Wedding Idea was found by: JaneMarie4 Wedding Idea From: http://iloveswmag.com/2012/08/23/arkansas-barn-wedding-by-daniel-kim/ Photography: Daniel Kim […]

  7. avatar Occasions In Print reply

    Great advice, Caitlyn! At the end of the day the wedding will be your memories. Make it what you want them to be!

  8. avatar Inspiration | Coral Summer Wedding | Katie Lyn Photography reply

    […]  [Image Sources: Jen Huang Photography via Style Me Pretty,Michelle Lange via Style Me Pretty, Elisa Bricker via The Wedding Chicks, Jemma Keech via Project Wedding, Jen Huang via Southern Weddings, Daniel Kim via Southern Weddings] […]

  9. avatar Tessi Adams reply

    Absolutely in love with the Mr. & Mrs. Chair cover. Where can I purchase them for my wedding?

  10. avatar Jackie reply

    Looks like a wonderful wedding! intrigued by the gorgeous Mr & Mrs Chair Banners, are they ivory and gold color, and any indication where i might buy? kind regards, Jackie

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Hey friends! We’ve already asked for your help once with our preparations for V5 (respond here if you haven’t done so yet!), but today, we’re back with another query!

We’re working on a special feature for the next issue, and we’d love to know: What do YOU love about the South?

Emily was kind enough to volunteer one of her favorite things about the South for this post – deviled eggs! (Both photos from Saveur) Maybe for you it’s front porches, or sweet tea, or peaches at the height of August ripeness. Whatever it is, we want to know! Just leave a comment here telling us what you love most about the South. If you leave your first name, last name, and hometown, as well, we’ll assume it’s okay to print your answer in V5! We’d love to have you join us!

P.S. We had one of our last photo shoots for V5 yesterday at our office, and the set-up was pretty crazy! Here’s a snap:

Can’t wait to share!!

marissa Written with love by Marissa
25 Comments
  1. avatar Kristyn M reply

    Handmade wooden rocking chairs on big front porches!

  2. avatar Kathi reply

    Buttermilk pie!

  3. avatar Katie O’Keefe reply

    Big, lazy trees hanging over a drive full of Spanish moss….love it

  4. avatar Megan Smith reply

    Fried anything…especially pickles!

  5. avatar Theresa reply

    The slow pace to life.

  6. avatar Jess // Curating Style reply

    How friendly everyone is, the history, fried chicken, and the better weather. And of course, my wonderful boyfriend is from the South, and I’d be amiss in neglecting to mention him. :)

  7. avatar Jennifer reply

    heritage. reinvention. the smell of tobacco smoking in a barn in the fall. our dusty rural areas make for some pretty spectacular sunsets. family dinners – oh the cooking!

  8. avatar Rachel reply

    SEC football
    Big hair
    Bigger wedding parties
    “Y’all”
    Lace & burlap
    Monogrammed seersucker

  9. avatar Kelsey B. reply

    I love sweet tea, tailgating during football season, big front porches, beach music and shagging, and the smiling faces that follow “Hey y’all!”

    -Kelsey Ballance
    Columbia, SC

  10. avatar Christina S. reply

    Warm pecan pie with a scoop of vanilla bluebell ice cream :)

  11. avatar Lindsay Heisler reply

    I love how the old mixes with the new so well in the South. In Charleston,SC you can spend the day touring old homes and then have dinner at a new and wonderful restaurant. And there is no place better for Shrimp n Grits and Sweet Tea!

    Lindsay H.
    Greer, SC

  12. avatar Laura reply

    Too many things to count! All the amazing Southern desserts, the word “y’all,” hospitality, seersucker, manners, gentleman who hold open doors for you, the warm weather…the list goes on and on!

  13. avatar Ashley reply

    SEC Football! Family dinners that include 5 generations, sunny beach days on the gulf and hurricane parties. -Ashley Moore, Pensacola, FL

  14. avatar Lauren Winstead reply

    Hands down, my favorite thing about the South is the fierce loyalty we all have to it. It’s full of hardworking people who love and believe in their friends and neighbors, and I’ve never visited a place where home and family are so important. And the food isn’t bad, either! -Lauren Winstead, Raleigh, NC

  15. avatar Kate Collison reply

    I’m a “Southern Transplant” – born in Indiana and getting married in Georgia… I’ve fallen in love with The South quite rapidly! My fiancé calls me a “displaced peach” because I get homesick for southern living! My most favorite part of The South is the genuine, simple hospitality that goes along with every aspect of life… whether it’s daily or for a big occasion! The world needs more of that. Plus, there are southern pines. I love southern pines.

  16. avatar Delaney Gates reply

    I love that in the South, ladies and gentlemen are not the exception, but the rule. –Delaney Gates (Rogers, Arkansas)

  17. avatar Lisa reply

    Where to begin? I love that every Southern state has special qualities that make it unique, but we all value family, kindness, hospitality, loyalty, and politeness above anything else! -Lisa Olson, Warrenton, VA

  18. avatar Victoria Derrick reply

    I love College Football season in the South. SEC all the way, baby! (Columbia, SC) Go Carolina Gamecocks!

  19. avatar Diego Molina reply

    Quality of life low pace, football and most defenitively the foood. Ohhh one more hospitality :).

  20. avatar Samantha Daniels reply

    Everything is simply sweeter in the south…the people, the tea, and the football victories. Samantha D. Matthews, NC

  21. avatar Madelynne Moulton reply

    My favorite thing about the south would definitely have to be the ‘southern gentleman’.

    My husband has opened the car door for me for FIVE years and counting. Men here are nicer, more polite, and know how to treat a lady!

    Madelynne Moulton – Birmingham, AL

  22. avatar Shelby Thomas reply

    Long words, wide front proches, sweet tea in a Mason jar, pine trees, SEC football, and putting’ on pearls no matter what the occasion!

  23. avatar Katie Bethune reply

    Grandma’s house in the summertime!

  24. avatar Katie reply

    I love the peace that settles in after a summer sunset. The sky is that perfect shade of blue and pink, the lightning bugs are coming alive, everyone feels content and the air smells of fresh cut grass. Now that I live in a more urban (and northern) area, that’s something I miss the most, especially on summer nights when all I want to do is run barefoot through the grass and see who can catch the most lightning bugs.

    Katie Eide
    Meadowview, VA

  25. avatar Ashleigh Farley reply

    I love that in the south your hair can never be too big, tea can never be too sweet and you can never give too many hugs.

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Friends, I struggled with today’s Emily Plans a Wedding post! I knew since the beginning that I wanted to post about DIY projects, but the closer the wedding has gotten, the less I’ve wanted to reveal. Not because I want to keep y’all in the dark, so much; more because I know many of my family members and friends — those who will be attending the wedding! — are Southern Weddings readers, too, and I want as much as possible to be a delightful surprise for them on the big day.

Because why do we have “details” at our weddings? Because they look pretty? Well, yes, but for me, it’s more than that — by looking pretty, details act as cues to let guests know, Hey! This is a special occasion! This commitment and this day is so important to us that we’ve taken the time, energy, thought, and, yes, money, to make it a night to remember! We are so happy you’re here, and we care enough about you to want to make it a special and memorable occasion! YAHOO! Details should also say something about the couple whose wedding is being celebrated — who they are, what’s important to them, what they find beautiful. Maybe that sounds a little farfetched or lofty, but we are the home of the Sweet Tea Society — we think about these things!

Cheese cart by Calder Clark Designs (photo by A Bryan Photo via Southern Weddings) and band backdrop via Ritzy Bee’s instagram feed

John and I have tried to keep all of this in mind throughout the planning process, and today, I wanted to offer a few tips to y’all. A few stories from the last several months are sprinkled in, as well!

1. Decide what projects are most important to you, and focus on them. My definition of “project” — and “DIY,” for that matter — is pretty broad. Not the crafty type? Then by all means, purchase from Etsy or leave it to your vendors! Even if you could care less about what your cake topper looks like, I know there’s something that matters to you, and I bet there’s a project tucked somewhere in there. Is showing your guests amazing hospitality your highest priority? Then collect a stash of you and your fiance’s favorite treats and make the best. welcome. bags. ever. Focused on the ceremony? Craft it with your officiant, or focus on writing personal vows. Love beautiful bouquets? Spend time searching for the prettiest ribbon.

Now for you crafty types who want to take it all on, my best advice is to edit. Sure, I can appreciate all sorts of real weddings and all sorts of clever ideas, but when it really comes down to it, there are very few details that are really a perfect fit for who John and I are and the type of celebration we’re planning. Be ruthless about what is a good fit and what is not, and which projects ultimately get added to your to do list.

Chalkboard menu by Simplesong Design (photo by Kate Headley) and poppers photo by Katie Stoops via Southern Weddings

2. Start as early as possible. We’re in the last few weeks before our wedding day, and those first heady months of engagement seem a long ways away. This tip is a reminder to me, as well, though there’s not much I can do about it now! I tried so hard to check projects off early — and did succeed in getting a few complete — but there’s only so much you can do without knowing all the details of your wedding day, or your guest count. That being said, try to do as much as possible as early as possible.

3. Set a schedule — and a cut-off date. Once you’ve figured out your tentative list of projects, group them in a tentative order — i.e. designing your ceremony programs will have to be near the end, but perhaps making table numbers could be closer to the beginning. Then, build each project into your schedule. Assign each a month. Unless you are SUPER disciplined, know that some projects will just not happen in the month they’re assigned to – I’m still working on projects I thought would be finished in July! And that’s where the second part comes in — set a cut-off date. I don’t care if it’s a month before your wedding or 24 hours before your wedding, but give yourself a little breathing room — and a little grace — to say, I’ve done all I can do, and now I’m going to enjoy it.

Wine bottle photo by Amy Arrington and flowers photo by Lisa Lefkowitz

4. Think ahead and be as efficient as possible. This goes for time AND money. When I’m planning a trip to JoAnn or Michael’s, I look at my project list and try to see if there are any upcoming project needs I can purchase for at the same time (helpful to avoid stopping at a craft store four times a week… not that that’s ever happened to me). Likewise, if I know I’ll be placing an order with an online retailer like Paper Presentation or UPrinting, I try to look ahead to see if there’s anything else I might need from them down the road. You can usually save on shipping that way (or qualify for free shipping!), and sometimes there are even discounts for placing an order over a certain amount.

5. If money is an issue, be realistic about the true cost of DIY. I know handmade items can sometimes look expensive (especially when you start thinking, I could do that!), but when you’re knee-deep in glitter, going on DIY hour three, and starting over on your fourteenth reception sign, that Etsy offering might start to look mighty reasonable. Yes, you can usually buy supplies for cheap, but you usually have to buy in bulk to get a good price. If you’re not the type of person to use the remaining five pounds of feathers after you’ve extracted the two you need for a hair flower, is that really money saved?

Rice toss packets from Martha Stewart Weddings and welcome bag photo by Jen Huang

6. Likewise, be realistic about your expectations — and taste level. Y’all have probably heard me say I have champagne taste on a beer budget, and I’m sure the same goes for many of you. We see beautiful photos every day, and it can be extremely frustrating to finish a project, and have it fall short of our expectations. If you’re going for a homemade look, this can work out wonderfully! If you’re going for a high-end look, though, be realistic about what you will be able to achieve with minimal skill. For example, I did the calligraphy on our invitation envelopes, but I went with a pro — Moya Minns — for our names on the invitation itself. I knew I would never be able to achieve the look I was after by myself, and that was a place where perfection really mattered to me. The envelopes? Eh, I was happy with what I was able to cobble together.

7. Know when to let go. Once upon a time I thought it would be a brilliant idea to make a crepe paper hair flower for each of the female guests at our wedding. Did this fit with the vibe we were going for? No, not really. Was I able to make a few beautiful hair flowers? Yes, absolutely. I even had a crafting night with a friend, and over two hours, we made about 15 flowers. At the end of our crafting session, though, I wasn’t even that excited. I realized that even though I could persevere and fol 45 more flowers, I didn’t really want to — and sometimes, that’s enough of a reason to stop. Luckily, I was able to repurpose the materials elsewhere!

Cocktail sign photo by Jose Villa and floral letter photo by Matt Blum

8. Accept help when possible. This is a tough one for me, y’all! I am a perfectionist when it comes to projects, and I am totally guilty of the “I’ll-just-do-it-myself-because-it-will-take-longer-to-explain-to-and-supervise-someone-else” mentality. But you know, people really do want to help, and in many cases, many hands really do make light work. If you break down your projects step by step, you’ll probably find that there are parts even non-crafty types can help with. Over the last few months, my Mom and John’s sister have cut ribbon (they were both very accurate!), and John himself has stuffed, licked, and stamped envelopes. I’m saving a few projects specifically to do with my family the week before our wedding that I know will go quick assembly-line style.

I hope these tips don’t come off as discouraging, because I am a HUGE advocate of DIY projects! Obviously — my list of projects for this wedding includes but is not limited to boutonnieres, our wedding website, our menu board, welcome bags, invitation calligraphy, our vows, our slideshow, reception desserts, our marriage certificate, our guest book, favors, ceremony programs, and about eight billion pieces of signage. I think DIY projects can make a wedding so personal and heartfelt and unique, and I absolutely encourage you to take a few on. Hopefully, with a little patience and planning, it will be a positive experience for everyone!

Now tell me: Would you consider yourself a DIY bride? What projects are you taking on for your wedding?

In case you missed a post…
The main characters | Where we’re getting married | I go dress shopping | We choose a photographer | I ponder bridesmaid style | Mini food! | The music | We’re renting a tent! | We discuss bouquets + boutonnieres | We send out our save the dates | I gather hair and makeup inspiration | We talk cake and sweets | I introduce you to our videographer | We create a registry | We buy a tuxedo | We style a reception | I choose accessories | We take engagement photos! | We plan our ceremony | We discuss ceremony music and readings | We firm up wedding day details | We send out invitations

Amy Arrington, Jose Villa, and Katie Stoops are fabulous members of our Blue Ribbon Vendor Directory!

emily Written with love by Emily
7 Comments
  1. avatar Sharon @ Red Poppy | Pink Peony reply

    Great advice! I’d call myself a semi-DIY bride. I DIY’d my cake topper, map/direction cards, programs, printed out coloring books for kids, put together all the escort cards and favors, had a photo guest book made, printed all the menus, etc. It’s fun and special to add a personal homemade touch, but you have to know when it’s too much!

  2. avatar Christina S. reply

    Love LOVE these words of advice. I am in the exact same boat, just over a month before my wedding, and I keep telling myself “There’s so much out there, you can do more!” I think there should be a point, maybe 2 months before the wedding, where you have to tell yourself “I know what I like, time to stop browsing and make it happen.” My vision hasn’t changed in the past few months anyways, so unless its something totally necessary (like the seating chart or programs you still need to design) then you should start putting your energy into bringing those projects to fruition. Following that thought, its time for me to get to work!

    • avatar Emily reply

      Best of luck with your final preparations, Christina!! I’m sure your projects will turn out beautifully!

  3. avatar Stephanie reply

    Just what I needed to read, Emily! I am currently waist-deep in DIY projects right now, and I keep having to be realistic about what I can do on my budget and time. I did give my sweet fiance ONE huge job, so that helps me out and gets him involved. So many people ask me what they can do to help, and like you I am a perfectionist so it is hard to accept their offer! I have small tasks that they can help with, but how do you suggest I make this “one hour project” into something to where they feel like they are making a huge difference?

    • avatar Emily reply

      Hi Stephanie! In my experience, people don’t necessarily need or want to feel like they’re making a huge difference, just that they did SOMETHING to help you out. Just choose the project carefully (so you can both be happy, not frustrated, with the process and outcome!), try to make the work fun if you’re doing it together (have music, snacks), and thank them profusely at the end :)

  4. avatar What You Need To Know About Wedding Planning | WeddingDates Blog | reply

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