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Engage10 :: The Breakers

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Hi y’all!  What a week! Emily and I were at the Engage!10 conference at The Breakers and a little somethin’ somethin’ hit news stands while we were there!  We’ve been so busy that we haven’t had time to soak it all in.  The love on Twitter is overwhelming!  Thank y’all SO MUCH for the amazing support.  We put our hearts and souls in V3 and we’re so glad you love it as much as we do!

Emily and I on the pink carpet! Photo from DVB Photographers

We have a huge Engage recap and some fun surprises coming soon, but for now enjoy these great clips from Cloud Nine Creative.  Thank you Breakers, Rebecca Grinnals, Kathryn Arce, Trisha Hay and everyone involved in making this a magical week!  We were so honored to debut V3 in wedding paradise!

Day 1:

Engage 10 {Day One} from Cloud Nine Creative on Vimeo.

Day 2 + 3:

Engage ’10 {Day 2 + 3} from Cloud Nine Creative on Vimeo.

A quick shot from my iPhone of V3 and some Engage goodies.  This was my 5th Engage and they just keep getting better!  So overjoyed to attend, to learn, to spend time with great friends, to get fired up about inspiring brides to tell their unique love stories and to be a second-time speaker.  So much more goodness to come, y’all!  If you just can’t wait, check out my Facebook page for Engage10 pictures galore!

P.S. The new SW site launches very soon!  We’re a few days behind with all this excitement and coming home to very full inboxes of sweet messages, so we hope to launch next week.  Email Katharine for a special V3 launch discount on new site ads!

lara Written with love by Lara Casey
10 Comments
  1. avatar Elizabeth Hafner reply

    WOW! I am in awe. I follow the Engage tweets but this is amazing. To see it. Gorgeous. Looks like an amazing event that I would love to experience one day, for my self. Thank you for sharing!

  2. avatar Monica Majors of Paper Cut Industries reply

    This event looked amazing! Just absolutely gorgeous and I would love to one day attend. Bravo everyone! -xx

  3. avatar Lisa Tilley-Newman reply

    Could I be any more GREEN with envy???? I don't think so!!! It's like you all died and went to wedding HEAVEN!

  4. avatar Emily @ Southern Weddings reply

    Lisa — yep, that pretty much sums it up! :)

  5. avatar Shannon Gray reply

    Looks amazing! Hoping to attend one in the future! :)

  6. avatar DK Designs reply

    Loved the photo of Emily, Simon and Lara holding up the Yummy lunch boxes with my clay anemone flower! Couldn't be more perfect. I so wish I could have went and finally met the 2 of you!

  7. avatar Jeannine @ Small & Chic reply

    I didn't realize all conferences had those ribbons that you attach to the bottom of your badge. We have them at my professional conference, too. The longer you're there, the more ribbons you seem to need. I'm up to 3 right now. :)

  8. avatar Jeannine @ Small & Chic reply

    I didn't realize all conferences had those ribbons that you attach to the bottom of your badge. We have them at my professional conference, too. The longer you're there, the more ribbons you seem to need. I'm up to 3 right now. :)

  9. avatar Brit @ Landlocked Bride reply

    While I have yet to flip through V3 (just returned from the honeymooon), I am quite jealous you were both able to attend Engage! It happened to fall right in the middle of our honeymoon. Looks like you gals had a great time, and have loved flipping through all of the photos!

  10. avatar Kim Votaw reply

    Lara,Great recap… Your panel discussion was very, very helpful! My first Engage! Who knew learning so much could be this much fun!!?? And so dang pretty!!

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Hi friends!  After our very old-school question of a few weeks ago, I’m back with a very modern one today.  Kristin sent me a one-sentence missive (I appreciate a girl who gets to the point) with a simple question: “Do you think it’s appropriate to ask someone to be your bridesmaid in an email?”

The short answer?  No, I don’t think it’s appropriate.  If you’re asking someone to be your bridesmaid, it should mean she’s a close friend or family member, someone whom you know quite well and really value having in your life.  Asking her to stand beside you on your big day is a way of recognizing that bond, and thanking her for it.  It’s nice to commemorate the occasion with something more than an email.

But what?  If you live nearby, asking her out for a meal – whether dinner, brunch, or cupcakes and coffee – is a lovely gesture.  If she lives halfway across the country, you still have meaningful options.  The simplest would be to pick up the phone and call.  Or, for those of you more technically savvy, it could be fun to arrange a Skype call.  (That way, you can see her happy surprise!  Or, if you’re feeling particularly ambitious, you could Love, Actually style and prepare some cardboard signs to reveal your intentions.  By the way, Best. Movie. Ever?  Yes, I think so.). 

Or perhaps a card is more your style.  You can get very elaborate, with a pictorial representation of your relationship through the years and a novel about how much she means to you, but a store-bought card with a sincere note will stand in nicely, too.  There is certainly no shortage of DIY inspiration or ready-made options:

Image credits, clockwise: Martha Stewart Weddings, Once Wed, Sweet Bella Cards, Lilly Pink Paperie.

What do y’all think?  Are there any occasions when an email is appropriate?  How did you ask your bridesmaids to stand beside you?

As always, feel free to email me your etiquette conundrums for a future column!  I’m emily at iloveswmag dot com.

All header images c/o Millie Holloman

emily Written with love by Emily
8 Comments
  1. avatar LAG reply

    I guess I really did not ask… I mailed each of my girls a box with a satin clothes hanger inside. I attached a little note to each hanger that said "For your bridesmaid dress…" So now we all have pretty dresses with pretty hangers for the big day!

  2. avatar Rachel – theWeddingVine reply

    These cards are so cute, who could say no if they received one?

  3. avatar Janine reply

    I asked each of my bridesmaids by giving them a little box with a cupcake inside and a tag that read, "Will you be my…" See my blog for pictures: http://janineraedesign.com/2010/09/24/wedding-fridays-asking-my-bridesmaids/It was a sweet but simple way to make them feel special. :)

  4. avatar Sarah reply

    I was asked to be a bridesmaid with the "once wed" paper doll style. SO cute!!!! I made homemade folded cards and envelopes to ask my bridesmaids. Each envelope was lined with paper that matched our wedding colors. I also noted in the card that they'd be able to wear shoes of their choosing!

  5. avatar Heather reply

    Hi, Emily! Normally, I would agree with you and say that email is not the most personal medium through which a bride would ask a friend to be her bridesmaid. However, when my fiance' and I became engaged, we were unable to call all of our friends to share our happy news due to the remote location and horrible cell phone reception. One of my dear friends learned of our engagement through a mutual friend, and was upset that she had not been included in our initial round of calls. When the time came to ask my nearest-and-dearest to stand with me on our wedding day, I desperately wanted to avoid any hurt feelings, so sending an email to all bridesmaids simultaneously seemed to be the best choice. Each girl responded positively with enthusiasm and excitement, and I followed up with a phone call to each bridesmaid shortly after the email was sent. I think that each bride should ask her friends in a way that reflects her personality, and also takes into consideration the feelings, schedule, and lifestyle of each of her desired bridesmaids. :)

  6. avatar Jessica reply

    Worse than an e-mail, I used a facebook private message, because I couldn't tell if she used her e-mail any more.I was trying desperately to talk to my best friend, who is currently working in Asia, with a 12 hour -difference in time zones, with no phone, splotchy internet, and on slow computers both sides. None of our attempts to skype chat were working, and I didn't have her address, nor could I take the time to send a card, with no idea how long it would take to get there. I needed to know if she could even make it! But luckily she can, and will, and graciously accepted, despite my admittedly tacky way of asking. She forgives me, so I forgive myself, even if Emily Post never would.

  7. avatar Charity H. reply

    Even with our 'techie' generation email is still informal and professionally it is looked upon as being a remote and distant way of communicating. If you have something important to say it is suggested that you do it personally. Therefore, if sending an email is the way you ask a friend to be your bridesmaid it could come across like you don't value her decision or acceptance very much that you didn't take the time to put a little more effort into asking her.

  8. avatar MMW reply

    Since I was living in Oklahoma and half of my would be bridesmaids lived in Virginia I did use email to ask them. However, my maid of honor and I put together a Power Point slide show of pictures of me in my wedding dress holding signs with the words, “Will you be one of my bridesmaids?” We used lots of different poses and it was a great way for the other girls who weren’t nearby for a lot of the planning to get excited about the wedding!

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K + C enjoyed a lake-front reception with family and friends at Crisp’s family plantation, Thronateeska Bluffs, and we can’t think of a better setting for an outdoor celebration.  The couple’s four-tier round wedding cake is elegant and traditional, but take a look at that chocolate groom’s cake!  Turkey feathers and shoot gun shells?  A-mazing.  I was hoping for a few more shots of the bride in her stunning Amsale gown, but luckily Katie’s short Lela Rose reception frock is retro, chic and all kinds of fun.  Victory!  BIG, big thanks to 509 Photo for sharing their classic, timeless shots of the big day.

Tell us about finding your wedding dress: Drama! Like most girls, I had been dreaming of a wedding my whole life, but the dress eluded me! I looked through all kinds of magazines and scoured the internet, but just didn’t find the one.  My mother and I visited almost every bridal store in Atlanta, but I wasn’t having any luck on finding “the one.”  On the last day, we went to Bridals by Lori, where they were having an Amsale trunk show.  I narrowed it down to two dresses I liked and thought could be my wedding dress.  I ordered one of the dresses, and six months later it arrived, but was ALL WRONG!   The designer had changed some of the design elements that had been part of the runway dress I had originally tried on at the trunk show. It was a mess!  After a lot of help from one of the managers, Amsale sent me a new dress in 1 week!  And at the end of the day, I loved my dress!  It was stunning and classic.  My nightmare must have made for a good storyline, because they asked me to film an episode for the new season of “Say Yes to the Dress!”
Describe your wedding flowers: I carried a hand-tied bouquet of white cymbidium and dendrobium orchids, white hydrangea, caramel antique garden roses with accents of turkey feather tips and seeded willow eucalyptus.  I wanted all neutral colors: soft whites, champagnes and greens… simple!
Describe your wedding cake: Simple and delicious! You can’t go wrong with pound cake.
What was the biggest challenge you had to overcome while planning your wedding? The guest list! Crisp and I are both are from small towns, and it’s hard not to invite everyone!
What was your most memorable moment about your wedding day? I would say our exit from the ceremony! In true Southern style, after we said our I Dos and were presented as Mr. & Mrs. Gatewood, we surprised guests with the Mule Drawn-Quail Hunting Wagon that drove us away. We left waving to family and friends and enjoyed a short romantic ride down an oak-lined drive. We spent about 30 minutes taking those memorable “We’re married!” pictures.  I loved those first few moments as husband and wife!
What’s next for you as a couple?  What are you looking forward to in the future? We are finally getting settled into our new house! We have done a little remodeling, and everything is starting to come together. I need to learn how to cook, even though Crisp does a great job, and only have about 100 more thank-you notes to write.  We are loving every minute of married life!  

Written with love by Katharine
7 Comments
  1. avatar Nookie Doodle reply

    Wow, loved the duck plates!!! Beautiful …

  2. avatar Kendall reply

    I saw her on Say Yes to the Dress Atlanta and thought it was the same girl this morning before I saw the rest of the post! The dress was beautiful and I'm so glad it turned out right!

  3. avatar Melissa reply

    This was one of the best Southern weddings you've ever posted. Great details! What an amazing venue.

  4. avatar Rachel – theWeddingVine reply

    Gorgeous venue and love the use of flowers in the cake!

  5. avatar Dennis @ Wholesale Flowers reply

    That's really great that Amsale was able to get you a replacement dress in a week. It's even better luck that your original dress arrived in time enough for Amsale to send you another. The wedding pictures are great. Looks like everyone had a great time.

  6. avatar Corinna Hoffman reply

    Oh my.. what a beautiful setting for a wedding!! Love ALL the reception details :) Thanks for sharing!

  7. avatar Katie Gatewood reply

    The lakeside pictures are actually from our rehersal dinner the night before:) Much love!

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