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I am SO excited to introduce our December Southern Bride of the Month to y’all. In addition to being one of our sweetest and most active readers, Madi (fun fact!) was almost our 2012 summer intern! Circumstances kept her in Texas, but we’ve enjoyed keeping up with her ever since, and are so excited about her upcoming wedding (January!), and the chance for y’all to get to know her a bit better today. Let’s begin!

Hi! What’s your name?
Madi Reid (on Twitter)

What’s your fiancé’s name?
Bret Sanders

Amanda Marie Photography

How did the two of you meet? Tell us your story.
We have been together for three years now but it always feels like longer because of our long-standing friendship. Bret and I were long time family-friends. It’s actually kind of a crazy web of connections, but simply put, Bret’s aunt and uncle are my parent’s best friends.

We grew up in a close-knit community and went to high school together; Bret was two years ahead of me in school but at the time we were just great friends! We both dated other people and never considered there might be something in store for us. Bret went to school at the University of Missouri-Columbia and two years later I headed South to Texas Christian University in Fort Worth, Texas. We had stayed in good contact throughout this time and much to my surprise, Bret began his pursuit of me from afar. In 2009, my freshman year at TCU, he asked me to join him on a date back home over that Thanksgiving break. I was kind of hesitant and actually declined his offer! Bless his heart! We laugh about this now because I was a little stubborn in the beginning. That next month, Bret asked once again and this time I took him up on dinner and a movie. We had so much fun and everything seemed so easy and natural. We have been together ever since!

Amanda Marie Photography

Now tell us alllll about the proposal.
I was supposed to be doing a photo shoot with my friend Amanda (She is also my wedding photographer!). It was a rainy evening and we went down to an old train station in downtown Fort Worth. We walked in, and I was expecting to see another girlfriend of mine, Annie, there to help with the shoot as well. I didn’t see her anywhere, and things began to seem a little bizarre. Amanda began rambling about how neat the building was. As I searched around for Annie, I noticed a man standing up from a bench across the room. I recognized his walk, and his build. When I heard him say, “Hello beautiful!” it hit me that it was Bret. Y’all, this is where you have to laugh, because instead of a swept-off-my-feet-by-his-sweetness reaction, the first thing I said to him was, “What are you doing here?!” Poor thing! I was so confused!

Bret was not supposed to be in town until the following day to celebrate my birthday, so I was not expecting him at that moment. He took me into his arms and I felt his heart beating faster and faster. Though I was in shock, it all started to sink in. After saying the kindest words and bringing tears to my eyes (and his own!) Bret got down on one knee and asked for me to be his wife. The best part? Amanda snapped pictures of the entire thing! Sneaky, sneaky!

Amanda Marie Photography

When’s the big day?
January 12, 2013 — It’s coming up so quick! Bret and I are definitely lovers of the summer season, and we had always envisioned exchanging nuptials in the warmer months. However, Bret had the itch to propose pretty early in October of 2011, and I still had a year of school 600 miles away. We didn’t want to have a 20 month engagement just for the sake of a summer wedding, so we set the date for the soonest we could following my graduation. I was not the biggest fan of this decision in the beginning, but once we got going on the plans I fell in love with the idea of a celebration in the winter!

Where might you two be tying the knot?
Our hometown of Liberty, Missouri! It is quaint with a strong sense of community while still being just 20 minutes north of some incredible venues in downtown Kansas City. There was no other place more perfect than the place we were raised!

Madi’s inspiration board. Fun fact – I designed it! Madi wrote into our “Ask the Experts” series last January and we put together three posts helping her bring Southern warmth to the winter months!

How did you pick your ceremony venue? What do you love most about it?
When we knew a winter wedding was in the works we had to start looking at indoor venues. The ceremony site was a quick decision. Bret and I will exchange vows at his family’s home church, Liberty Christian Church. This spot is very dear to both of us as it is where we first met back in junior high youth group and where we were both baptized. It is so neat to us that both of these big steps in our walks with the Lord will be taking place under the same roof! And how about those stained glass windows! I love!

Main Street Studios

Tell us a little bit about the wedding you’re planning: style, theme, feel, colors?
I have adopted the term “Rustic meets Romance” throughout our planning process. Still, I want a very classic style, so the rustic elements are minor. We also have a strong Southern theme going with the use of cotton as a floral element and burlap runners on our tables. More than anything, I want the warmth and feeling of Southern hospitality to be the biggest takeaway for our guests… no matter what the temperatures are outdoors!

Burlap reception details (Kristyn Hogan via Southern Weddings) and cotton boutonnieres (Melissa Schollaert via Southern Weddings)

Who or what has been most helpful and/or inspiring in the wedding planning process?
I am a wedding blog nut… and always have been! Southern Weddings has stood as my first daily blog visit for the past four years! I can’t get enough! The “Emily Plans a Wedding” has also been beyond helpful! Thank you, Em!

Bret and I also seem to have been to a wedding just about everywhere in this past year… 8 total! I have taken many photos and mental notes throughout this exciting season of life to use for our big day.

How have you involved your “community” (friends, family, etc.) in the wedding planning process?
I don’t know what I would have done without my mom during this time. She is truly amazing! I’m planning from states away, and I know that without her, none of my plans would be executed! She has been so gracious to give of her time in order to help Bret and I have such a special day.

Has your vision for your wedding changed or evolved over the course of your engagement? If so, how?
It’s so funny how when you begin the planning process, the ideas you once had change considerably. When I first envisioned my wedding, I pictured a summer’s eve, an old wooden barn and bright florals, boots and bow ties, fireflies and moonlight. When thinking of when and where we would wed, it seemed like a celebration outdoors was the only option! (Maybe it is because all of the beautiful outdoor ceremonies I had swooned over on Southern Weddings!) Even as a church-goin’ girl, I just never considered exchanging vows in a church. When BRS proposed in October, with my graduation date set for December of the next year, we knew our dream of a summer wedding just was not in the cards. No way did we want to embark on a 20 MONTH engagement! Summer of 2013 quickly turned into January 2013. Kansas City winters bring quite the chill and snow fall is no surprise ‘round those parts, so a winter wedding date meant no outdoor venue.

Unknown

What part of wedding planning, if any, has made you the most anxious?
I am very Type-A and as an aspiring wedding and event coordinator I have worked on the other side of many weddings. This sounds so ridiculous, but what has made me the most anxious is the feeling that something will not go according to plan. And from all I’ve learned, not everything will go according to plan! This day will definitely be a test of my patience, but I will be sending up many prayers that I will give up all control to the Lord on that day. No matter what goes off-kilter, I will still be Bret’s wife when it’s all said and done!

What wedding-related decision have you been the most indecisive on?
Haha! Let me start by saying I’m glad the decision was finally made. I asked Bret if there was anything in particular that he was adamant about having a say in. He said food (of course!) and what the gents would wear. I gave a big sigh of relief when he wanted to tackle these two items, because in all honesty, he is better in the kitchen than I am, so I trust his judgment on our reception meal. Also, it was my thought that guys really had limited options as far as what they wear for their wedding. This black tux or this black tux… right?

Wrong. Bret, showing his most stubborn side, refused to wear a traditional black tux. He didn’t want to be “boring” or do “what everyone else does”. (His words, not mine!) He also believes that renting a tux never results in a good fit for every guy, and with our budget, buying the tuxes was out of the question. We seemed to be at a crossroads. When it came down to it, though, I wanted for Bret to feel as though his voice was heard on this topic, and I wanted him to have the freedom to choose his attire for the day just as I had been able to. Together, we proceeded to throw around the idea of charcoal gray or navy suits instead… and we threw it around for a period of 3 months. Three months!!! Navy eventually emerged as our final decision. Bret was thrilled, and I was just thrilled to be finished with that decision!

Handsome groom and groomsmen in navy (Sean Curtin Photography)

Tell us about the one that got away. Is there one dream thing or vendor you wish you could have fit into your budget?
This will probably sound so crazy (and this just shows you how blessed I’ve been to be able to have most everything we’ve wanted) but I still wish we could rent chivari chairs or even wooden folding chairs! Our venue comes with a basic black chair which is fine… but I think everything could look much more polished with some wooden or bamboo chairs! How silly is that?

One major budget bonus that Madi was lucky to get – custom-designed invitations by Paperfinger for FREE! (Shown above, though with a different backer!) Read the whole story here!

Have you picked your dress yet? How’d that go? What will you be wearing on the big day?
I found my gown very early on, and that is one detail that has remained a secret! I am very open about my planning process through my blog and in conversations with friends, but that is one thing I really wanted to save as a surprise for the day. I can tell you that I love it! It’s very classic and perfect for me!

One very important accessory I am so excited for is my veil! I fell in love with Katharine’s cathedral length veil with lace detail when I first saw it a couple years back. My very talented aunt offered to make this accessory for me, so we have gathered pictures for inspiration and set our hearts on recreating something similar to what Katharine wore. We are using a gorgeous ivory vintage French lace. I am giddy!

The inspiration, Katharine’s veil. (A Bryan Photo via Southern Weddings)

What do you love most about Southern weddings?
There is just a raw feeling of intimacy in a Southern wedding even if your guest count is 200+! Maybe it’s the strong ties to tradition, or the warmth of Southern hospitality. Maybe it’s the love between a Southern bride and groom and the blessing they received from their parents to join their lives together. Whatever it is, it’ll steal your heart and you won’t look at a wedding, or more importantly a marriage, the same again.

Tell us about planning with your fiancé. Has it gone smoothly? Is he more involved, or hands-off?
He has definitely been more hands-off, but only because he is focused on work and also doing a full renovation on our first home! He and his brother own a business where they buy homes and renovate them to rent them out. They came across a home for us, and Bret has been hard at work preparing it for our move-in just after the wedding.

What do you wish you would have known at the beginning of your engagement?
Engagement isn’t always a blissful time. It has actually been a much harder time for Bret and I than we imagined… but at the same time, it’s been good for us. It has challenged us to be real with one another and pushed us to look past the silly arguments about the guest list or the food selections and remember why we fell in love in the first place.

Amanda Marie Photography

What are you most looking forward to on your wedding day?
The ceremony… hands down! We are both very emotional, but not the kind of emotional that’s scared to be emotional, if that makes sense? Bret and I are both really excited to exchange our vows, sweet words and make that commitment to one another in front of the Lord, our families and dearest friends. I can’t help but think those moments will be so surreal and magical!

Any advice you’d like to pass along to fellow brides?
Put the most focus on preparing your relationship for marriage, not preparing yourselves for a wedding. (This is advice I probably needed to take many times throughout our planning instead of getting so caught up in the design and details of that one day.)

Oh! But on the planning front, create an email address specifically for wedding related communication. Use this email address for all contact with vendors and anyone involved in the planning process. There were too many times information would get lost among all of my school and work emails… I wish I would have heard this piece of advice earlier on! I hope future brides can put this one to use!

Now it’s your turn to ask for advice – is there anything you’d like to poll the SW readers on?
My biggest hope is that I am able to soak in each moment on the wedding day. Any suggestions on how to make the most of every moment and not get caught up in the schedule of the day or rushing through the moments? Thanks y’all!

Thank you so much for joining us today, Madi! It has truly been a pleasure. Readers, if you’d like to apply to be a Southern Bride of the Month, check out this post for all the details! If you’ve already emailed me, you’re still in the running for future months!

Melissa Schollaert is a fabulous member of our Blue Ribbon Vendor Directory!

emily Written with love by Emily
14 Comments
  1. avatar Madelynne Moulton reply

    Take a deep breath in the morning. Get up early, eat a hearty breakfast and just focus all your energy on the positive – the love you have for your groom, all the people there to celebrate, the beautiful, personal details, the blessing of having a glorious God. If you do that, it will be okay if there’s little things you forgot. That’s what pictures are for!

  2. avatar Emily reply

    Eek! So excited to see Madi featured as the Southern Bride of the Month. I’ve been following her blog for awhile now and just love how much her excitement to marry Bret shines in each post. With the wedding right around the corner, congratulations are never too early. Congrats Madi and Bret! Hope your day is most magical!

  3. avatar Mary reply

    Madi is just the cutest ever! I used a lot of the same details in my spring wedding last march. I love that she used elements that fit any season! Yay for Texas weddings!

  4. avatar Kristin reply

    Congrats Madi!! I am so excited for y’all. Enjoy these last few weeks for the wedding. Remember to stop and take deep breaths during the wedding weekend. Take it ALL in and have so much fun!

  5. avatar Nicole reply

    Congrats Madi!! I love your sweet engagement photos, and we can’t wait to see more from your cozy winter wedding :) Also, I’m a little obsessed with the dress you wore in your engagement photos — way cute!

  6. avatar Lisa reply

    Her sweet proposal pictures brought a tear to my eye! What a beautiful couple with beautiful wedding plans!!

  7. avatar Luke Davis reply

    So great Madi! Very excited for you and this phase of life you’re in. And, love your style!

  8. avatar Shelby reply

    Absolutely love it! Cutest white winter details, and such a lovely engagement story! Can’t wait to pour over Madi’s blog! :)

  9. avatar Kelly reply

    Love you Madi! I’m so excited for your marriage most of all! And I looooove that inspiration board. This post makes me so happy!

  10. avatar Chelsey reply

    Congratulations Madi! My best advice to enjoying every second of your day (which you probably know from your wedding experience…) is: hire a great coordinator! Best wishes to you. Love your style!

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I am SO excited to introduce our Southern Bride of the Month to y’all. Like last year’s November SBOM, Lauren was a familiar face to the Southern Weddings ladies already, since she’s one of our lovely readers who comments often (we love when you join the conversation!). I hope you enjoy! And ladies, make sure you take a minute to answer Lauren’s question at the end!

Hi! What’s your name?
Lauren Leschper (on Twitter)

What’s your fiancé’s name?
James Zarzour (on Twitter)

How did the two of you meet? Tell us your story.
It was my sophomore year of college at the University of Georgia, and I had waited until the last minute to try to find a date for my sorority’s semiformal. My friend’s date had two roommates that I could’ve been set up with – but luckily everyone decided James and I would be a good fit. It was the first and last blind date for the both of us, and we spent the whole night talking and laughing.

A few of Lauren + James’ engagement photos by Lacey of Scobey Photography

Now tell us alllll about the proposal.
It was last December, and James and I had been together for 5 years. At this point we had been talking about marriage for a while, so I knew it was coming but not when. So when he suggested we drive up to Athens to go to dinner, visit our favorite brewery, and walk around historic North Campus, I was a little suspicious. We hit terrible traffic on our way up, so we were afraid we wouldn’t have time to stroll around campus at all, but luckily we made it to town just when the sun was starting to set. If you aren’t familiar with North Campus – it’s full of gorgeous old magnolias, historic buildings, and a beautiful fountain next to the field where UGA played their very first game. After what seemed like hours (but was only about 15 minutes) walking around campus, we were standing by the fountain just talking. Then he got down on one knee – and admittedly I don’t remember what he said (I’m sure it was very sweet and romantic). I do remember that I said YES! It was the perfect proposal – just the two of us.

Lauren’s engagement ring photographed by Lacey for Scobey Photography

When’s the big day?
December 8, 2012

Where might you two be tying the knot?
The Old Courthouse on the Square, Decatur, Georgia. Decatur is such a sweet little town, sort of a mini-destination just outside of Atlanta. It has everything guests could want, including all of the wedding events, so once they arrive for the weekend they can just enjoy themselves! (And no cars needed!)

How did you pick your ceremony and reception venues? What do you love most about each space?
We’re holding both the ceremony and reception at the Old Courthouse on the Square. I’ve known for a long time that I didn’t want a ballroom wedding, but I just fell in love with the marble, tall ceilings, and huge windows at the Courthouse. It’s a perfect blank canvas that still has lots of personality. And I sort of love the fact that we’re having a “courthouse wedding,” even though it’s a very traditional ceremony.

The Old Courthouse on the Square (photos by Woodland Fields and Michelle Scott)

Tell us a little bit about the wedding you’re planning: style, theme, feel, colors?
This may sound like an oxymoron, but we’re planning a wedding that is both formal and fun; “Southern vintage” is probably the closest to a true theme.

Our colors are navy and ivory, with accents of sage green and champagne. Even though it’s technically a “winter” wedding, we wanted to keep a warmer, less “icy” palette.

Who or what has been most helpful and/or inspiring in the wedding planning process?
Not to be stereotypical – but Pinterest! I also love looking at blogs (ahem – Southern Weddings) for photos and inspiration. We’re attending about 8 weddings this year, too, so I’m getting some tips on what to do (and maybe a few things to avoid) firsthand!

We love Lauren’s color palette! How we’re envisioning it… (Photos by Jose Villa with flowers by Amy Osaba, Patrick Moyer and Jennifer Dery via Elizabeth Anne Designs)

How have you involved your “community” (friends, family, etc.) in the wedding planning process?
One of the most exciting parts was getting to involve my sister (who isn’t quite so passionate about white dresses and flower arrangements as I am) in the wedding through design. She’s an amazing artist, and designed my invitations herself from scratch. She’ll also be helping me with some of the DIY elements, like our chalkboard program and menu board.

Has your vision for your wedding changed or evolved over the course of your engagement? If so, how?
Yes and no. Some of the vendors I’ve been in love with from the beginning and that has only grown – my caterer Sun in my Belly, my florist Maria from Amy Osaba. The main thing that has changed is my original idea of a more rustic wedding, maybe in a barn – obviously the Courthouse is a far cry from that, but I love it!

What wedding-related decision have you been the most indecisive on?
Napkins! That’s the silly detail I’m wrestling with now – but honestly, most of the most difficult decisions have been some of the smallest in the grand scheme.

Which part of your wedding have you been most intentional about planning?
James and are incredibly passionate about food. He’s a beer rep (keeps our house very well stocked!) so the bar was key, too. Luckily, we found Sun in my Belly immediately from a recommendation from my boss. As soon as we met them and tasted their locally-sourced menu, we were sold! We carefully chose a menu to reflect our backgrounds: the cocktail hour will feature Middle Eastern food in honor of James’ father’s Lebanese and Egyptian family, and dinner will be incredibly Southern (think fried chicken and mashed potatoes). We’ll only be including craft beer and spirits as well – some from the US, some from abroad.

With a beer rep groom, you know the drinks will be good! Lauren loves these Pimms Cups and this clever sign (photos by Jose Villa and from Martha Stewart Weddings

How has the budgeting been? What’s your best budgeting tip?
The hardest part was determining a budget in the first place. I obviously haven’t ever planned a wedding before, so my mom and I had NO idea what things would cost! The best tips I can give: lots and lots of research, and use spreadsheets to keep track! Also, don’t be afraid to ask – for example, we have coffee service with dessert for a fifth of the usual price, because we asked our caterer about other options for serving (rather than the fancy and very expensive silver carafes).

Tell us about the one that got away. Is there one dream thing or vendor you wish you could have fit into your budget?
A videographer. Having someone capture all the little moments that photos can’t show would be so amazing, but it’s just not something we could justify in the budget.

Have you picked your dress yet? How’d that go? What will you be wearing on the big day?
Yes! I actually bought it in January – it’s been sitting in my closet for months, since the designer accidentally rushed the order! I went with just my mom, and we didn’t cry when we found “the dress,” but it was such an amazing experience to share with her. Of course, it’s nothing like what I thought I’d pick!

Lauren loves sleek updos, and so do we! (Photos by Cristina G and Raquel Reis)

Do you have a favorite Etsy or independent store you’d love to tell us about?
Clark and Charola at Tough and Twisted do amazing work – we ordered personalized, handforged bottle openers for our groomsmen gifts (can you tell beer is a theme yet?). They just came in and are incredibly cool.

Any plans for a honeymoon? Where do you want to go and what will you do?
We’re sort of doing a dual honeymoon! Some of our good friends live in San Francisco, so we’re spending a few days there on our way to Hawaii! The “real” honeymoon is seven days in Maui at an amazing resort there.

Any advice you’d like to pass along to fellow brides?
Be organized, and only try to do one big thing at a time. There were definitely stressful moments, but the fact that I kept very detailed spreadsheets of every vendor contacted and every one that had been booked saved my sanity. It also meant that I could keep track of the budget constantly. (I recommend Google Docs, because you can share and collaborate with any vendors, or your parents or anyone else helping plan and pay for the big day).

Now it’s your turn to ask for advice – is there anything you’d like to poll the SW readers on?
What color napkins should I choose?? But seriously – I’d love to know what one detail of your wedding is the most special to you. Maybe I’ll get some inspiration!

Thank you so much for joining us today, Lauren! I’m so glad we got to know better! Readers, if you’d like to apply to be a Southern Bride of the Month, check out this post for all the details! If you’ve already emailed me, you’re still in the running for future months!

Scobey Photography is a fabulous member of our Blue Ribbon Vendor Directory!

emily Written with love by Emily
15 Comments
  1. avatar Katie reply

    Exciting!! We share the same wedding date! I have no idea what to tell you for your napkin color…it all depends on how you’re involving your other colors. Good luck!

  2. avatar Anna reply

    Love your ideas! I think you should do navy and ivory napkins!

  3. avatar Anna reply

    I love that beer is one of the themes here! This sounds like a great, fun wedding. Also, the story of this couple meeting is so sweet! I can’t believe they met in college. Best of luck!

  4. avatar Emily reply

    Too hard to pick just one detail that was the most important, but I have to say that we spent a TON of time choosing the readings and musical selections for our ceremony! Totally worth it in the end :) Other than that, I had a very clear vision for (and was very excited about!) my bouquet!

  5. avatar morgan klaus reply

    Hey Lauren! Jazzed for you guys.

    A little advice on the napkins – color won’t matter in the grand scheme of memories but white fuzz will be remembered! As long as they won’t shed and color everyone’s laps white, you can’t go wrong!

  6. avatar Laura reply

    I had hoped for a videographer too, but didn’t have the budget for it either. But after the wedding, I found time to write down everything I could remember (as recommended by Emily) and I think that will help me remind me of the details that I might forget down the road.

    The one detail that I was so happy that we did was have a big group picture with all of the guests on the front steps of the church. It only took a little bit of wrangling, but it ended up looking amazing!

  7. avatar Kristin reply

    I vote for deep navy napkins with a gorgeous swirly ivory monogram! (If you have a few extras you can save them and bring them out on your anniversary each year!!)

  8. avatar Ashleigh reply

    LOVE the Pimms Cup idea! I’m searching for a signature cocktail to add to our beer & wine options. I actually love the whole beer theme! My husband-to-be is a huge craft beer lover – he’s already picked out the local brews for our big day! Good luck!

  9. avatar Miriam Patrick-Prince reply

    I’m not sure if Lauren remembers, but she and I went to high school together (only for a year when I moved)….. I got married in June and the one thing that made my wedding so special and I’d recommend to every bride is to do your own version of the Jewish tradition of yichud. It is a traditional way of giving the bride and groom a few minutes of peace and quiet before going out to see family and friends. My sister, and maid of honour, helped us out. When we left, we slipped into a back room of the venue and my sister brought us full plates of food. We got to eat in private, just the two of us. Then we were able to go out to the party and mingle without starving.

    I wish you the best! Happy wedding!

    Miriam

  10. avatar Taylor J reply

    Oh, please go with navy napkins!!! Maybe an ivory border to them…or even y’alls monogram! Can’t go wrong…navy is SO classic!

  11. avatar Kat reply

    hi lauren! girl i know EXACTLY what you mean about the little details sometimes being the hardest! i’m currently planning a july affair and some of the SMALLEST things have been stressing me out! some advice i was given: think about practicality as well as style. of course, you want the napkins to blend with your wedding & to fit the color scheme (and in the that case i love the idea of classic navy or a rich sage green!), but when guests look back on it, they probably won’t remember what color they were! however, i bet they do remember if they shed white fuzzy’s all over their little black dress! :) good luck with the last month of planning girl! best wishes on a the day of your dreams & the marriage full of happiness :)

  12. avatar Katie reply

    Best wishes, Lauren! This last month will FLY by.
    One of my favorite, most special moments was our exit. We made sure to stand at the top of the stairs for just a few seconds and take in all our family and friends cheering us on!!! (and the immediate silence when the door closes on your getaway car and you realize you’re FOR REAL married) oooweee you’re going to have such a great day!

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  14. avatar Lauren reply

    Thanks everyone for the advice! We went with the sage green napkins – they just fit better with the softness of the overall decor (lots of ivory and blush tone-on-tone). We did splurge a little and chose specialty linens for the head table – a gorgeous ivory-on-ivory geometric pattern. We’re so excited – less than 2 weeks to go!

Southern Weddings reserves the right to delete comments which contain profanity or personal attacks or seek to promote a business unrelated to the post.  And remember: a good attitude is like kudzu – it spreads.  We love hearing your kind thoughts!

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I always love chatting with brides who choose to get married in the winter, which is just one reason I’m excited to introduce Melissa to y’all! Please join me in making her feel welcome! (Also, be sure to check out her intriguing question at the end — I know I’ll be chiming in!)

Hi! What’s your name?
Melissa Vause (here’s my blog)

What’s your fiancé’s name?
Stephen Feetham

Landon Jacob Productions

How did the two of you meet? Tell us your story.
Stephen and I met during his first year as a grad student, and my last year as an undergrad, at USC. He was teaching a lab that I had begrudgingly signed up for in order to graduate. The first day of class, I immediately noticed him, and was so glad I’d signed up for “Weather and Climate.” I had a crush on him the entire semester and made a lame attempt to flirt, but he didn’t seem interested. Being a moral teacher’s assistant, he paid me no special attention, and I earned that “C” fair and square!

Once the semester was over, we continued to talk, and got to know each other a little better over the next year. Finally, we set a time to hang out, and my best friend went with me to a favorite local bar to meet up with Stephen and his friends. Continuing with my impressive flirting skills, I asked him if he wanted to watch season one of Lost. It actually WORKED and we watched every single episode together. On St. Patrick’s Day 2010, we had our first “real” date, and we’ve been together ever since.

Now tell us alllll about the proposal.
Starting around Christmas 2010, Stephen and I joked and flirted with the idea of getting engaged. One particularly hot summer night, he mentioned that we should get a blender to make milkshakes. My response? “No, people put blenders on wedding registries.” Taking the hint, we never got a blender… not even a cheap one. We joked about the blender for months, and talked all the time about how much we wished we had one, but instead, we just held out and made our milkshakes with a spoon.

On December 6th, Stephen came into the room with a giant smile on his face and a cold glass in his hand. He had made me a peanut butter banana milkshake! I looked inside the glass and thought, “This looks rather emulsified.” I squinted my eyes and asked, “How did you make this? Not with a spoon…” He proudly declared that he’d bought a blender, then got down on one knee and asked me to marry him! It was perfect‼

Landon Jacob

When’s the big day?
December 1, 2012

Where might you two be tying the knot?
My home town of Charleston, SC! I may be partial, but this city is hands down the MOST beautiful place to live. It is rich in culture, heritage, and good ol’ Southern hospitality.

How did you pick your ceremony and reception venues? What do you love most about each space?
Stephen and I love downtown strolls together, and I think we chose venues that encompass all things historically beautiful. The ceremony will be held at St. Luke’s Chapel in the heart of the downtown area, and the reception will be held alongside the Cooper River, at the newly renovated Harborside East. It’s stunning inside and out and has the BEST view of the peninsula you could ever imagine. Harborside East is also right under the famous Cooper River bridge, which houses the nation’s third largest 10k, a race Stephen and I have run together with my family for the past three years.

Beautiful Charleston, as captured by Virgil Bunao and Joey + Jessica

Who or what has been most inspiring in the wedding planning process?
Pinterest and SW Mag, of course!! I am such a frugal McDougal; I refuse to pay for anything I can do myself. Those two places and Green Bride Guide have inspired lots of crafts and projects. Stephen and I pride ourselves on being a green household, and anything you will find at our wedding is either upcycled or recycled! Blue Planet Green Events has been a wealth of information, too!

How have you involved your “community” in the wedding planning process?
Our families and my bridesmaids have been so helpful the past ten months, especially my mom. You would think a year to plan a wedding would be enough time, but you’d be surprised how quickly it sneaks up on you! After I designed and printed the formal invites, my mom spent countless hours with me cutting, sticking, gluing, and addressing them all. She has also done a lot of the leg work running around collecting vintage items for the reception! My MOH has been extremely helpful, as well, collecting over 1,000 corks and over 50 wine bottles from local restaurants out of which Stephen and I will create our centerpieces.

On the left, Melissa’s inspiration for her bouquet (from Martha Stewart Weddings, photo by Simply Bloom). On the right, her inspiration for the gents’ boutonnieres – they’ll be made from fabric leftover after the bridesmaids’ dresses are hemmed!

What part of wedding planning, if any, has made you the most anxious?
Finding a baker! I’m not much of a cake person — years of eating Funfetti cake and canned icing are probably to blame :) I had originally planned to have an old friend make our cake because it was NOT a priority in our budget. However, I started feeling anxious about the hundreds of different flavors and fillings there are to choose from, so I attended a wedding expo with my MOH and ran across a very small, local bakery. With one bite, McKenzie’s Bake Shop changed my mind about cakes. Forever. She is as sweet as pie, and so great at what she does, that we now go to her for every event that needs dessert, as well as the occasional Monday that simply demands a cupcake.

What wedding-related decision have you been the most indecisive on?
Oddly enough, picking a wedding gown! Years of shamelessly browsing wedding dresses in college (before I even had a boyfriend!) was not enough to prepare this bride for actually choosing a gown of her own. I love lace, I love beading, I love fluff, I love asymmetry… I just. Love. Wedding dresses! And no, I don’t think I have ever missed an episode of Say Yes to the Dress!

Which part of your wedding have you been most intentional about planning?
A few years ago at the annual Flowertown Festival in Summerville, a catering company, Cricket & Kyle (family-owned and formerly run out of a church kitchen), had a booth of the most DELICIOUS crab cakes I’ve ever had in my life. Growing up on the beach, Stephen and I both have high expectations for our seafood. Based solely on their crab cakes, we promised the owner that, whenever we got married, we’d have him cater! I carried his business card in my purse for TWO YEARS, and he was one of the first vendors we booked once we got engaged. Lucky for us, we found out at our tasting that he can dish up more than just amazing crab cakes, and I must say he has a mouthwatering spin on shrimp ‘n grits!

from Bon Appetit

We’re also really excited about our photographers! When Stephen and I moved to a house in Columbia, we got to know a nice couple down the street from us, who just so happened to be the talented photography duo Landon and Jordan of Landon Jacob Productions! I have been a HUGE fan of their work ever since, and it’s been kind of an unspoken agreement that when we were ready for a wedding photographer, we’d have to look no further than outside our living room window. When we got engaged, I think Jordan was just as excited as I was!

Have you picked your dress yet? How’d that go? What will you be wearing on the big day?
Oh golly! I am example no. 1 of “the girl who bought two dresses.” Two weeks after getting engaged, I brought my mom, aunt, cousin, and MOH dress shopping with me on my birthday. We quickly breezed through the first two stores in Charleston before heading to NY Bride and Groom in Charlotte. I had one set style in mind, and didn’t really try on anything else. I ended up falling in love with a beautiful beaded fit and flare lace dress, and we bought it that day.

But I didn’t stop looking. Something was missing, so I continued to browse dresses in the hopes of either dismissing or validating my initial dress decision. Eight months later, I was STILL looking, and dragged one of my bridesmaids to go with me to try on yet another dress I’d spotted in a magazine. I ended up hating it on, and was this close to settling on my first dress. On the way out, however, my bridesmaid pulled a dress off the rack and begged me to try it on, simply because we both thought it would look ridiculous! It was a giant ball gown, champagne in color, and the exact opposite of anything I had ever tried on.

I put it on, and my heart stopped beating. I immediately started crying, and knew this was the dress I wanted
to walk down the aisle in. I love it so much and can’t wait to put it on again!

We love the choices of these two brides, just two of the many featured on our Southern Styles board! (Left by Phindy Studios, right by Belathee Photography)

Do you have a favorite online shop you’d love to tell us about?
I am in love with Jenna Lou Designs and I would be remiss not to mention her! She creates, among many other items, custom clutches. She designed the clutches for my bridesmaids and personalized them with a hand-stitched patch on the inside!

What has been the biggest challenge so far in wedding planning?
Sticking to a budget! As much as I would like to splurge on vendors, we have done as much as we possibly can ourselves. The stationery was a big one. It’s so easy to get caught up in spending a lot of money on save the dates, invitations, and calligraphers, but I am handy enough with graphic design and was able to design and print both our save the dates and the formal invitations myself. The bridesmaid flowers, groomsmen bouts, centerpieces, and wedding favors will all be DIY, as well. Luckily, we have completed nearly all of our planned projects, and we hired day-of-coordinators to pull it all together for us!

Another one of Melissa’s DIY projects – paper flowers made out of old maps to decorate their cake!

What are you most looking forward to on your wedding day?
Seeing Stephen for the first time as I walk down the aisle. I have loved him since the moment I laid eyes on him. The several seconds it will take to walk towards him will feel like an eternity; it’ll be hard not to start running! One of our readings sums up my emotions perfectly.

Any advice you’d like to pass along to fellow brides?
I have two major pieces of advice. 1) The wedding is not just about you and your fiancé, but your families as well. Appease and be flexible. 2) Try on more than one wedding dress style! Even if you think you have a clear idea of what you want, try everything else on anyway. This is the only time in your life you have to try on wedding dresses… don’t sell the experience short by limiting yourself to one style. Who knows, what looks ridiculous on the rack might turn out to be the dress of your dreams!

Now it’s your turn to ask for advice – is there anything you’d like to poll the SW readers on?
What is one thing you wish you’d done in planning for your wedding that you didn’t get around to?

Thank you so much for joining us today, Melissa! We’re excited to see how everything turns out in December! Readers, if you’d like to apply to be a Southern Bride of the Month, check out this post for all the details! If you’ve already emailed me, you’re still in the running for future months!

P.S. Check out all our past Southern Brides of the Month here!

Landon Jacob is a fabulous member of our Blue Ribbon Vendor Directory!

emily Written with love by Emily
10 Comments
  1. avatar Magnoliawp reply

    I adore the paper flowers!! the colours , the style , totally in love! <3

  2. avatar Melissa V reply

    Thanks so much for the opportunity!! It looks great :-D Emily, what was your one thing you wish you’d gotten around to doing??

  3. avatar erin {a lowcountry wedding} reply

    congrats! can’t wait to see the big day!

  4. avatar Joyce Feetham reply

    What a lovely interview! And I’m sure Melissa and Stephen’s wedding is going to be beautiful! It’s exciting that I will soon be Melissa’s mother in law!

  5. avatar Courtney Porter {Dogwood Events} reply

    Melissa,

    Congratulations! Your wedding will be beautiful! One of the things that couples tell me that they regret most in planning their wedding is not hiring a videographer to capture their ceremony so that they can relive it later. Take a look into it.

  6. avatar Haley reply

    Would you mind to tell me who the designer and name of your dress you wore is? It’s beautiful!

  7. avatar Ashley reply

    Her dress is beautiful! Who is the designer?

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