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A few weeks ago, I wrote about the urgency of wedding planning – that if you do it right, you only get one chance, but if you do it right, you only need one chance.

I also shared that I feel confident we (John and I) “did it right” – that we honored our one precious and beautiful wedding day, and that the meaning we found in that celebration has buoyed our marriage for the last five years.

But on a practical note, how did we create a meaningful wedding day? I think the answer of what makes a wedding day meaningful will be different for everyone, but today I would love to share with you ten things that made our wedding day meaningful. Hopefully they will get your wheels turning for your own!

1. Our wedding location. We both grew up and our relationship was born on the New England shore. It’s where I feel most at home, the place from which we both set out into the world, and the landscape I find most beautiful. Getting to share one of our favorite places with our far-flung guests was very special.

2. Our ceremony venue. We chose to get married at the chapel on the grounds of the Coast Guard Academy. My Dad was in the Coast Guard and taught at the Academy for most of my life, so I have years and years of fond memories with the base as a backdrop. I’m also kind of painfully patriotic (ha), so I loved being able to share this part of my heritage with our guests, some of whom might never have stepped foot on a military base before.

3. My bridal party. I chose four bridesmaids to stand beside me – my two sisters, and my two future sisters-in-law. I loved that my wedding gave me a chance to honor these amazing ladies, to recognize them as important people in my life, and to thank them for all they have done for me!

4. My veil. One of my sisters-in-law was married just two months before me, and she and I decided to have a veil commissioned. We both wore it at our weddings, and then one year later, my other sister-in-law wore it at hers! We are eagerly anticipating the next family wedding where it will make an appearance, and I’m already hoping my daughter and nieces will choose to wear it one day! I deeply value family traditions and legacy, so it was very meaningful to me to get to create a family heirloom from scratch.

5. Our portrait location. Bear with me here :) There is a very crazy story about how we came to take our portraits at a particular home, but the upshot is that it totally strengthened my belief that dreams can come true and that most people are generous and kind, something that has changed the way I move through the world ever since.

6. Our pastor. Our pastor from our church in North Carolina agreed to fly to Connecticut to officiate our ceremony, and it was without a doubt one of the most meaningful parts of our wedding. He has played such a formative role in our faith walk, and his presence and gentle guidance helped our ceremony stay centered on Christ.

7. Serving communion. We served communion directly following our vows. We chose to see the symbolism in our first act as a married couple being one of serving others while honoring our Lord, especially since we chose to serve our parents and grandparents first. We loved seeing so many beloved and familiar faces coming forward, and it was really special to have a brief moment with each individual guest.

8. Our cocktail hour picnic. Instead of joining our guests at cocktail hour, John and I had a picnic, just the two of us! Our caterers packed up a sampling of everything that was being served that evening, and we got 15 minutes or so to simply bask in our newly-married glow. Those few minutes are an iron-clad memory in my mind, and I’m so grateful.

9. Creating an aesthetic experience. I am an unapologetic lover of beautiful things and singular experiences, and it was a true joy to plan so carefully for so long and then to see all of my dreams and plans come to fruition under that perfectly blue September sky. Thoughtfully creating an immersive experience and then getting to enjoy it alongside our loved ones was very meaningful for me.

10. Giving a toast. At our reception, both John and I gave brief toasts. I believe deeply in saying the words that truly matter, and so I very carefully considered how I would thank and honor both my parents and John’s parents. Though I’ve had occasion both before and after to do the same, I think the sentiment shared in that setting will always hold more weight than any other.

I could go on, but I’ll stop there :) Though I’m sure your list of ways to make your wedding meaningful will be different than mine, I hope my experience might help get your wheels turning! I’m cheering you on!! :)

All photos by Tanja Lippert

P.S. Want to breeze past the logistics and budget to dos so you can focus on what matters most? Pick up a copy of the Joyful Wedding Planner ASAP – hundreds of brides have used it to plan their weddings, and I couldn’t recommend it more!

emily Written with love by Emily
4 Comments
  1. avatar Mollie reply

    I love the idea of a picnic after the ceremony, but I must ask… how did you get photos done and have time for a picnic!?

    • avatar Emily reply

      Hi Mollie! Haha happy to offer some insight! Our cocktail hour was about 1 hour. We used 15 minutes for our picnic, then the other 45 for portraits! Then we joined our reception! :)

  2. avatar Kirsti reply

    Thank you, Emily for sharing these tips! My fiancé and I have tried to keep our focus when making decisions during our planning process for our May 2018 wedding to have a wedding that truly represents us!

  3. avatar Kirsti reply

    Oh my goodness gracious! I just read your post Dreams Do Come True and it’s like we are soul mates! This is EXACTLY how I found my wedding venue – a lot of scouring on Google and then writing letter and eventually meeting with the oh so sweet owners that are willing to let us invite 200 of our guests to their home in May!

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As an editor at a wedding magazine, I’m often asked what I’m most “over” in submissions. It’s true, LOTS of weddings pass my desk every day, and though I don’t judge trends too harshly, there is one thing I’d be happy to never see again. And that is: baggy, ill-fitting, awkward groom attire.

It honestly makes me super sad! Here are the brides, shining oh-so-beautifully with a look that’s clearly been carefully refined over many months… and then here are the grooms, looking like they just rolled out of bed in their great uncle’s suit that’s three sizes too big for them. Sad!

I get it – in the past, the easiest, most reasonably-priced option was a local tuxedo rental. But, friends, I’m SO happy to say that that’s no longer the best option – not by a long shot. The best option is now The Black Tux.

If you search our archives, you’ll find dozens and dozens of couples who have already chosen The Black Tux for their wedding days. Put simply, The Black Tux offers high-end suits and tuxedos, rented online and delivered to your door.

Too often, renting a tux means worn out, cheap polyester suits that don’t really fit, and several trips to a brick and mortar store. The Black Tux has single-handedly changed that rental reputation, resetting expectations with a simple rental process, a better fit, and the finest wool available (no polyester involved whatsoever).

Not looking for a tux? Though The Black Tux does the classic black tuxedo oh-so-right, that’s just the beginning of their curated offerings. We’ve used their suiting collection – navy, tan, dark and light gray – in several magazine editorials, and have been so impressed every time!

Everyone knows wrangling a wedding party can be one of the most frustrating parts of wedding planning, but – guess what! – The Black Tux has you covered there, too. Simply choose a custom look for your wedding party, or pick from their professionally-styled complete outfits. You can even request a free home try-on for the groom, to see his pick in person.

Once you’ve made your choices, The Black Tux will email everyone with a look that’s ready to rent. Then, you can track your wedding party’s progress online as they set up their account, submit their sizes (so easy), and complete checkout to reserve their sizes for the big day. SUCH an improvement!

One more example of how The Black Tux looks out for you at every turn: your look will arrive two full weeks before your wedding! They want every order to be just right, so they allow plenty of time to make changes. If something’s not perfect, they send a new one right away–for free, of course.

Still worried about ordering online? Consider visiting one of the five The Black Tux showrooms across the country (Los Angeles, Chicago, Dallas, New York, and San Francisco) or one of their six Nordstrom boutiques (Atlanta, Boston, Denver, Orange County, Seattle, and Washington, DC). Book your appointment online and expect an ambassador to help you view the collection, nail down your sizing, and offer expert style advice.

If you’re in the market for stylish wedding wear, look no further than The Black Tux.

This post is sponsored by The Black Tux, a brand we have used and loved for years. Thank you for your support of the brands who make Southern Weddings possible!

emily Written with love by Emily
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Emily and I had a blast #MakingSouthernWeddings on our road trip throughout the South, but we’re pretty excited to be sticking around the great state of North Carolina for two final editorial shoots for V10! Our reader models have been just as fun as they are lovely so far, and we’re looking to add you to our crew!

We’d love for some of y’all to join us, so keep reading for more information!

Asheville, NC on June 8th
We’re looking for a bride, groom, and bridesmaids to to join us on Thursday, June 8th. If you’re interested, please send an email with the information below to howdy (at) southernweddings.com with the subject line: V10 Asheville Model Call.

Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill, NC on June 26th
We’re looking for some lovely ladies to join us on Monday, June 26th for a V10 editorial shoot. If you’re interested, please send an email with the information below to howdy (at) southernweddings.com with the subject line: V10 Triangle Model Call. 

All hair/skin colors are welcome! If chosen, we will need you to be available on site from about noon – 8 p.m. We might start later or end earlier, but we want you to be prepared! Please note that you must be 18 or older to apply and we are not able to compensate for travel/participation.

If you’re interested, please send an email to howdy (at) southernweddings.com with the subject line listed above (this will help us make sure we haven’t missed your email!) Be sure to include a recent headshot (no need for professional photos, we just want to see your lovely face!), a few candid photos, and your height. We promise it’s going to be a blast!

Written with love by Jess Metcalf
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Southern Weddings reserves the right to delete comments which contain profanity or personal attacks or seek to promote a business unrelated to the post.  And remember: a good attitude is like kudzu – it spreads.  We love hearing your kind thoughts!

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